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Old 05-14-2010, 01:54 PM   #44 (permalink)
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Bloodball's Best-forgotten Facts: Grumpires and Bat Brats

The Mager League Bloodball founders discovered in the holy text of Bloodball the mention of vampires, bat boys and even “full counts.” In the text, there were illustration of black-cloaked figures stooping over the necks of crouched grabbers (“catchers” in the old game) who were waiting for the flings to be thrown.

Adult referees were needed to keep the rules and bat brats had to carry the sacred clubs. It would be quite a spectacle seeing the bat brats flying though the stadiums during night games. Since there were no vampires in Hysterika at the time, the founders sent recruiters to Sylvania in the Old World.

Now negotiating with the vampire counts of Sylvania is not without risk, and some blood was spilled, but eventually a motley crew of vampires, young and old, was lured by the sport of bloodball and its promise of prestige and bloodsucking. The vampires were tricked into believing that occasional neck biting would be permitted in the game.

Though pleased with their official MLB vampiring uniform, it was quite a disappointment to the vampires to hear they were required to wear face masks to protect the grabber or clubber (“batter”) from puncture wounds. To add insult to injury, the vampires were then told there had been a mistake in spelling and that they should be called “umpires.”

This revelation just put the vampire counts in an even fouler mood, so when they did have to remove their masks, they typically displayed frowns and grimaces, so mager leaguers and fans alike began to call them grumpires, the name by which they are known today.

Last edited by hawaiiansky; 05-15-2010 at 01:35 AM.
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