Wow, excellent chapter. As someone who is involved in a long-distance relationship right now, I can tell you that that conversation between Dave and Gwen was dead-on.
One suggestion, I think that this exchange
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Tib
“Driscoll, do you have the biorhythm printout Coach Palmer gave you?” he said to me.
“It’s at home, skip.”
“Damn,” he said.
“I can go get it if you want.”
“No, that’s all right.”
“What did you need it for?”
“I was going to make a paper airplane out of it.”
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Would be better if you changed "I was going to make a paper airplane out of it." into: "The clubhouse is out of toilet paper" or something like that. The airplane line just sounded kind of forced. Don't take that wrong, still a great, great read.