[enigk]

BACKGROUND

The year is 3004. Major League Baseball has not existed since the late 2600's when Bud Selig VII was elected commissioner and subsequently ran the league into oblivion. A groundswell of support and nostalgia sweeps the nation after a recently discovered skeleton thought by most scientists to be alien in origin turns out to be that of Otis Nixon. So, a new league is formed. 26 cities pledge their support and are awarded teams.

Meanwhile, at the World Religion Caucus in Rome, what had started as a good-natured game of Scattergories leads to an extremely heated debate regarding which religion is the one, 'true' religion or, at the very least, the closest to it. So, the representatives of the 26 religions at the caucus decide that the only possible way to determine which religion is best is to summon up the deities and gods of their faiths and have them play baseball...

So, through meditation, prayer, rituals, etc. 26 higher beings are conjured into existence and enter the newly-formed league in America...to settle things once and for all.

SETUP

I came up with the above lame premise, but the meat and potatos is that I have created players within a new fictional league in OOTP6 - one for each of 26 religions. Their positions were random based off of whatever position the newly created character happened to be assigned to. (None of the created players will be pitchers - just batters). I then maxed all of their attributes (Batting Ratings and Batting Talent Ratings all set to 150, all positions' ranges and fielding %'s set to 100, etc). They are all Durable in Injury Rating, Extrememly Loyal to their team, don't need a winner, are Great Leaders, are Great in the clutch and goodly consistent. They are all identical in every single way. All parks are identical to maintain additional consistency. Financials are turned on.

The plan is to sim out 25 years and see which deity fares the best amongst his/her/its peers.

NOTES
I have been completely impartial in the setup and will continue to be. I am merely providing this as a humorous read for anyone out there who may be even remotely interested. You should not view this as a support or as a belittling of any particular religion or religion as a whole. (basically - I'm not trying to prove anything or praise any particular religion, I just think it's a funny scenario...)

PLAYERS
Below I have listed the participating religions as well as their representative in the league.

Aboriginal: Altjira
Aztec: Ometeotl
Babylonian: Apsu
Buddhist: Siddhartha Guatama
Christian: Jesus Christ
Confucianism: Confucius
Egyptian: Ra
Greek: Zeus
Hindu: Vishnu
Incan: Viracocha
Inuit: Tekkeitsertok
Irish (Celtic): Anu
Islam: Mohammed
Judaism: Abraham
Mayan: Hunab Ku
Norse: Odin
Pueblo Indians: Awonawilona
Pygmy: Khonvoum
Roman: Jupiter
Satanists: Satan
Scientology: A Thetan
Sikhism: Guru Nahak
Sumerian: Enlil
Taoism: Lao-tzu
Voodoo: Bondje
Zulu: uKqili

The draft will be held shortly - I will post the results as well as subsequent updates as frequently as I can.

[rogmax11]

Re: the Voodoo representative. Is that Barry Bondje? If so, I protest that this is rigged, and that all the lesser dieties are unfairly disadvantaged.

[enigk]

Round 1:

Columbus pick: SS Vishnu Vishnu
Norfolk pick: 1B uKqili uKqili
Greensboro pick: CF Lao Tzu
Little Rock pick: LF Zeus Zeus
Atlanta pick: C Viracocha Viracocha
Philadelphia pick: RF Tekkeitsertok Tekkeitsertok
Raleigh pick: SS Ra Ra
Houston pick: LF A Thetan
Orlando pick: CF Satan Satan
Pittsburgh pick: CF Ometeotl Ometeotl
Gadsden pick: 2B Odin Odin
New Orleans pick: C Guru Nahak
Buffalo pick: RF Mohammed Mohammed
Stockton pick: 3B Hunab Ku
Chicago pick: RF Siddhartha Guatama
Seattle pick: LF Khonvoum Khonvoum
Phoenix pick: 2B Confucius Confucius
Cincinnati pick: C Jupiter Jupiter
Cleveland pick: C Enlil Enlil
Hartford pick: RF Bondje Bondje
Memphis pick: LF Jesus Christ
New York pick: C Awonawilona Awonawilona
Oklahoma City pick: CF Apsu Apsu
El Paso pick: RF Anu Anu
Charlotte pick: LF Abraham Abraham
Lewiston pick: C Altjira Altjira

[enigk]

Originally Posted by rogmax11

Re: the Voodoo representative. Is that Barry Bondje? If so, I protest that this is rigged, and that all the lesser dieties are unfairly disadvantaged.

All deities are being subjected to stringent drug testing as well as head-body proportion measurements. Any violations will be punishable by...well, by themselves I suppose...

[enigk]

May 1st, 3004

The month of April provided an excellent start for some of our deities, while others seemed a tad nervous about the thousands of years of tradition riding on their performance. Voodoo representative Bondje (Continental League) and Islamic representative Mohammed (United League) each won their respective league's Batter of the Month Award.

Monthly Highlights:

4/1/3004 - Odin starts the season off right with a 5-5 performance, including 2 HRs and 5 RBI in Gadsden's home opener win against Raleigh

4/5/3004 - Tekkeitsertok (.556 / 4 HRs / 8 RBI) and Ra (.706 / 5 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

4/6/3004 - Guru Nahak has 5 hits against Little Rock

4/10/3004 - Mohammed hits for the cycle against Gadsden (his HR being a 530 foot Grand Slam).

4/12/3004 - Confucius (.542 / 5 HR / 12 RBI) and Khonvoum (.632 / 5 HR / 10 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

4/19/3004 - Bondje (.682 / 7 RBI) and Altjira (.636 / 11 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

4/26/3004 - Bondje (.538 / 6 HR / 13 RBI) and Khonvoum (.654 / 8 HR / 16 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

4/28/3004 - Bondje continued his early dominance over the league and sealed his Batter of the Month Award by hitting for the cycle against Charlotte.

Deity BA Leader: Bondje .539
Deity HR Leader: Satan / Mohammed 19
Deity RBI Leader: Mohammed 48
Deity SB Leader: Lao-tzu 25

[enigk]

June 1st, 3004

Pygmies were notably concerned, but remained upbeat (and small) regarding their deity, Khonvoum, who, despite his Durable rating, was injured on 5/27/3004 with an Inflamed Back Muscle and will be out 1-2 weeks. Several of the more trash-talking followers of other religions have repeatedly hassled the Pygmies claiming that no true deity would succumb to an Inflamed Back Muscle. Time will tell, however, who lords supreme.

Monthly Highlights:

5/3/3004 - uKqili (.583 / 4 HR / 7 RBI) and Hunab Ku (.615 / 4 HR / 7 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

5/3/3004 - Siddhartha Guatama hits for the cycle against Charlotte

5/7/3004 - uKqili singlehandedly smites Philadelphia, going 4-5 with 3 HRs (1 grand slam) 5 Runs scored and 8 RBI. Norfolk won the game 18-4.

5/8/3004 - The tides turn quickly as Norfolk, coming off of their destruction of Philadelphia, gets smoten by Charlotte's Abraham, who goes 5-6 with 3 HRs, 5 Runs scored and 6 RBI. Charoltte won the game 21-3.

5/10/3004 - uKqili (.565 / 17 RBI / 1.478 SLG) and Ometeotl (.696 / 12 RBI / .750 OBP) win Player of the Week Awards

5/17/3004 - Apsu (.571 / 6 HR / 9 RBI) and Zeus (.739 / 4 HR / 13 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

5/18/3004 - Philadelphia's Tekkeitsertok slams three solo homers against Phoenix. Philly won the game 4-1.

5/24/3004 - Tekkeitsertok (.550 / 10 RBI) and Odin (.556 / 6 HR / 16 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

5/24/3004 - Viracocha has 5 hits against Hartford - including 2 triples and 2 Home Runs

5/25/3004 - Confucius and his Phoenix teammates are NO-HIT by mortal James Petrey of Oklahoma City. When asked for comments after the game, an obviously frustrated Confucius muttered: "Confucius say: we totally blew out there tonight."

5/26/3004 - Raleigh Shortstop Ra hits three Home Runs against New Orleans. He finished the game 3-5 with 5 RBI. Raleigh won the game 12-6.

5/31/3004 - uKqili (.500 / 7 HR / 15 RBI) and Zeus (.615 / 9 Runs / .677 OBP) win Player of the Week Awards

6/1/3004 - Philadelphia RF Tekkeitsertok (.532 / 22 HR / 45 RBI) and Pittsburgh CF Ometeotl (.604 / 18 HR / 42 RBI) bring both leagues' Batter of the Month Awards home to Pennsylvania.

edit:

Deity BA Leader: Bondje .517
Deity HR Leader: Ometeotl 36
Deity RBI Leader: Odin 94
Deity SB Leader: Bondje / Lao-tzu 41

[enigk]

July 1st, 3004

At the All-Star Break, 4 deities have disappointed their devotees by failing to make their respective league's All-Star teams. Sikh icon Guru Nahak, Scientology icon A Thetan, Buddhist icon Siddhartha Guatama and Sumerian icon Enlil will all be watching the All-Star game from the comfort of their living rooms.

Guru Nahak seems to be drawing the most ire from followers and fellow teammates as he has only managed to post a .357 batting average which pales in comparison to the next lowest deity, Awonawilona, who is hitting .403. One unnamed teammate was quoted as saying: ".357?! What kind of deity hits .357? Seems to me that Albert Pujols should have his own religion if that's the case...even though that was 1000 years ago..." We'll see if Guru Nahak can turn things around and really start to light things up.

Monthly Highlights:

6/5/3004 - Celeveland Catcher Enlil goes 3-3 with 3 HRs and 5 RBI in a 11-5 victory over Raleigh.

6/6/3004 - Feeding off the success of fellow Ohio Catcher Enlil, Cincinnati Catcher Jupiter crushes 3 Home Runs with 7 RBI in a 15-6 win over New Orleans.

6/7/3004 - Sumerian deity Enlil (.611 / 13 RBI / .750 OBP) and Pueblo Indian deity Awonawilona (.650 / 16 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

6/14/3004 - Voodoo deity Bondje (.542 / 7 RBI / .607 OBP) and Norse god Odin (.714 / 15 RBI / 2.000 SLG) win Player of the Week Awards

6/18/3004 - Pittsburgh's mortal Manny Salinas NO-HITS Buffalo. Islamic deity Mohammed, Buffalo's Right Fielder, rested for most of the game with a scheduled day off. He was 0-1 in a pinch hit situation late.

6/20/3004 - Abraham (.524 / 5 HR / 11 RBI) and Mayan Hunab Ku (.545 / 3 HR / 7 RBI) win Player of the Week Awards

6/25/3004 - Voodoo deity Bondje hits for the cycle for the second time in 3 months against the Satan-led Orlando squad. Hartford won the game 8-6.

6/26/3004 - Not to be outdone, Zulu deity and Norfolk first baseman uKqili hits for the cycle against Charlotte. Norfolk won the game 10-9.

6/29/3004 - Memphis left fielder Jesus Christ goes 5-5 with 2 home runs (ironically, both off of curve balls) in a 10-5 victory over Houston.

7/1/3004 - Abraham (.483 / 17 HR / 36 RBI) and Odin of Gadsden (.547 / 42 RBI / .625 OBP) win Batter of the Month Awards.

Deity BA Leader: Bondje .516
Deity HR Leader: Odin 50
Deity RBI Leader: Odin 136
Deity SB Leader: Bondje / Lao-tzu 58

[rogmax11]

This is hilarious! Kudos for an original concept wittily presented. Undoubtedly the most LOLs per 9 innings on the boards.

[Vris]

Interesting premise and will continue to watch.

Casual Golfer: "Aww, tough luck Jesus."

Jesus: (watching his putt sail around the hole and in): "Wait for it.........boo yeah!"

[UngratefulDead]

This is brilliant.

[cibl commish]

Awesome thread!

Keep the laughs coming !

[ctorg]

Ah, I love a good sense of humor in a dynasty thread!

[Dagrims]

Really good idea for a unique dynasty. I hope to read about multiple seasons of the league.

Originally Posted by enigk

Round 1:

Raleigh pick: SS Ra Ra

Nice that Raleigh has a built-in slogan for their team. "Shish boom ba!"

[enigk]

Thanks for the compliments - I'm glad you guys are digging it! I made all of the deities exactly 21 years old at the beginning of the season, so I will post how they fare throughout their career up until retirement...I will also have the results of the All-Star game and a few more months of the season shortly.

This is my first time posting a Dynasty Thread, so if there's anything you guys want to see or know that would make it more enjoyable/interesting/whatever, just let me know and I'll do what I can.

[Gastric ReFlux]

This is hilarious.

[ctorg]

Is Satan allowed to cheat?

[enigk]

All-Star Game: July 1st, 3004

Well, it should be one hell of an offensive showing at this year's All-Star Game as both team's starting lineups consist of 8 deities each. The starting lineups are as follows:

CONTINENTAL LEAGUE
1.) C Viracocha (.442 / 24 HR / 63 RBI)
2.) SS Apsu (.438 / 38 HR / 88 RBI)
3.) 2B Confucius (.439 / 31 HR / 83 RBI)
4.) CF Tekkeitsertok (.491 / 43 HR / 90 RBI)
5.) 1B uKqili (.495 / 44 HR / 107 RBI)
6.) 3B Bondje (.516 / 45 HR / 103 RBI)
7.) LF Jesus Christ (.430 / 37 HR / 90 RBI)
8.) RF Satan (.436 / 40 HR / 77 RBI)
9.) P Warren Lyon (9-3 / 3.16 ERA / 100 Ks)

UNITED LEAGUE
1.) SS Vishnu (.462 / 36 HR / 88 RBI)
2.) CF Lao-tzu (.492 / 35 HR / 80 RBI)
3.) 3B Hunab Ku (.507 / 44 HR / 83 RBI)
4.) C Ometeotl (.491 / 47 HR / 97 RBI)
5.) LF Khonvoum (.443 / 33 HR / 75 RBI)
6.) 2B Odin (.493 / 50 HR / 136 RBI)
7.) RF Mohammed (.476 / 49 HR / 114 RBI)
8.) 1B Ra (.428 / 44 HR / 95 RBI)
9.) P Russell Miller (10-2 / 3.48 ERA / 170 Ks)

GAME RECAP

Top of the 1st - Viracocha started things off right with a single to CF. Apsu followed with a walk. Confucius flied out to shallow left-center. Following a wild pitch which advanced the runners, Tekkeitsertok blasted a 3 run HR down the right field line. uKqili singled to right. Bondje came up next and grounded into a fielder's choice, leaving him on first. With Jesus Christ at the plate, Bondje stole second and then scored on Jesus' line drive single to CF. Christ stole second, Satan walked and the pitcher struck out swinging, leaving two men on base.

CL 4 / UL 0

Bottom of the 1st - Vishnu tried a little trickery, attempting to bunt his way on on the first pitch he saw. The pitcher easily fielded the ball and fired it to first base retiring the Hindu. Lao-tzu then singled but was thrown out stealing on the next pitch on a perfect throw from C Viracocha. Hunab Ku crushed one down the right field line that sailed foul and ended up with a walk. Ometeotl strode confidently to the plate, but CL Catcher Viracocha nailed Hunab Ku trying to steal 2nd to end the inning. As Jesus trotted off the field, he playfully teased the Mayan god saying: "Thou shalt not steal, Bitch!"

CL 4 / UL 0


Top of the 2nd - Viracocha led off the inning by blasting the first pitch over the left center field wall to give CL a 5-0 lead. Apsu followed by drilling a ball right at 1B Ra who gloved it for the out. Confucius worked the count, fouling off many pitches, including an upper-decker down the right field line. He eventually flied out softly to Mohammed in right. Tekkeitsertok drew the walk but was stranded as uKqili popped out to Odin at 2B.

CL 5 / UL 0

Bottom of the 2nd - Ometeotl worked the count to full, but flied gently out to Jesus Christ in left. The Pygmy deity, Khonvoum, followed with a weak groundout to second. Odin drew the walk but was easily retired as Mohammed followed with a slow bouncer to second which Confucius easily handled for the last out of the inning.

CL 5 / UL 0

Top of the 3rd - Bondje led the inning off with a walk and then stole second on the next pitch. Jesus crushed one down the right field line which, again just sailed outside the foul pole. The very next pitch, mortal Russell Miller placed a fastball right on the black, sitting Jesus down with the K. Satan strode to the plate and took the first pitch for a strike as Bondje stole third easily. He flew out to shallow left, however, leaving Bondje 90 feet away. Pitcher Warren Lyon followed with a swinging strikeout to end their half of the inning, stranding Bondje at third.

CL 5 / UL 0

Bottom of the 3rd - Egyptian Sun God Ra continued the United League's offensive woes with a groundout to third. Mortal pitcher Russell Miller then looked on helplessly as a knuckleball floated right down the heart of the plate for a called third strike. Visibly determined, Vishnu stepped to the plate and crushed a 1-0 knuckleball into the left field seats to get UL on the board. Lao-tzu followed with a drive to left that just cleared a leaping Jesus' glove for back to back home runs, cutting the lead to 3. The tide seemed to be turning as Hunab Ku drove one to deep left, but Jesus squeezed it at the track, ending the inning.

CL 5 / UL 2

Top of the 4th - With new UL pitcher, Francis Gideon, taking the mound, Viracocha led off with a lazy fly ball to left center which Lao-tzu easily corralled. Babylonian deity Apsu then followed by lining a pitch past the outstretched glove of 1B Ra and down into the right field corner. When the dust cleared, Apsu was safe at third with the triple. Confucius brought Apsu home with a line drive single over the second baseman to increase CL's lead to 4 runs. Tekkeitsertok drew the walk, putting men on first and second for uKqili. uKqili grounded one hard to the pitcher, who fired to second retiring Tekkeitsertok, but the throw to first was late, leaving two out and men on the corners. Bondje followed with a hot ground ball between third and short, but Vishnu somehow nabbed it and fired it to first to end the threat.

CL 6 / UL 2

Bottom of the 4th - CL pitcher James Gabriele entered the game and retired Ometeotl on a groundout to SS. Khonvoum followed with a weak groundout to the pitcher for the second out. Norse god Odin crushed one to deep right field, but Satan was on his horse and chased it down at the track to end the inning.

CL 6 / UL 2

Top of the 5th - Jesus strode to the plate and drove a 2-0 curveball over the right field wall to extend the lead to 5. Satan followed with a lazy fly ball out to CF. Following a strikeout by the pitcher, Abraham came off the bench to pinch hit for Viracocha and lined a single into right field. Mortal Charles Melton then pinch hit for Babylonian deity Apsu and took the walk. Awonawilona pinch hit for Confucius and singled down the right field line, scoring Abraham from 2nd and putting men on first and second with 2 out. Tekkeitsertok followed with a sinking line drive into left center which drove in Charles Melton from 2nd and, again, put men on first and second with 2 out. The pinch hitting continued as uKqili was pulled for mortal Chadwick Isabel, who crushed a 3-1 pitch down the right field line for the 3 run HR and giving CL a seemingly insurmountable lead of 10. Bondje drew the walk from the visibly shaken UL pitcher, Gideon, and Jesus strode back to the plate as the CL All-Stars had batted around. Jesus took the walk and Satan followed with a 2 run double to left-center. Gideon threw a wild pitch, moving Satan to third, but struck out CL pitcher, Gabriele to, mercifully, end the inning.

CL 14 / UL 2

Bottom of the 5th - Up against the wall now, Mohammed led off their half of the inning by lining a ball to left-center that had double written all over it, but Tekkeitsertok made a sliding catch to rob him of the hit. Ra took the walk and Altjira came in to pinch hit for the UL pitcher. Altjira grounded a fastball past a diving Bondje at third to put runners on first and second with one out. Vishnu continued to prove that he came to play as he drove a 1-1 pitch over the left field wall for a 3 run homer, his second HR of the game, making it a 14-5 game. Lao-tzu and Hunab Ku each followed with walks, but Ometeotl fell short, grounding into the 6-4-3 double play.

CL 14 / UL 5

Top of the 6th - New pitcher Theodore Forsman took the mound and got Abraham to ground out to 2B Odin. A mortal flew out to right for the second out and Pueblo Indian deity Awonawilona grounded out to 2B to end the inning, 1-2-3.

CL 14/ UL 5

Bottom of the 6th - Ricky Haas took the mound for the CL and easily fielded a bunt by Khonvoum for the first out. Odin followed with a line drive past a diving Jesus Christ in left and ended up with a stand-up double. Mohammed followed by smashing a ball past the mortal 2B for an RBI single and advanced to second on the throw to the plate, cutting the lead to 8. Ra followed with a high fly-out to CF. Jupiter pinch hit for the pitcher and destroyed a 1-1 slider, sending it 452 feet from home plate, over the CF wall for a 2 run homer that dropped the CL lead to 6. Mortal Connie Kerry pinch hit for Vishnu and drew a walk. Lao-tzu ended the inning with a groundout to second.

CL 14 / UL 8

Top of the 7th - Facing a new pitcher, Tekkeitsertok was absolutely robbed of a single on a great diving play by 3B Hunab Ku. Mortal Albert Andrews followed with a double to left-center and Bondje was pinch-hit for by mortal Howard Panek, who weakly flew out to left. Jesus followed with a walk to put two men on, but Satan flew out to right, ending the threat.

CL 14 / UL 8

Bottom of the 7th - Hunab Ku's night was done as he was pinch-hit for by mortal William Trask. Trask singled to right. Ometeotl was pinch-hit for by Kendry Diez, who took the first pitch as Trask successfully stole second base. Diez was hit by a pitch, putting men on first and second with no outs and Irish deity Anu came in to hit for Khonvoum. Anu gave the Irish another reason to drink, as he grounded into a fielder's choice, leaving one out and men on the corners. Anu then stole second with Odin at the plate who drove one into the right field corner for an *Inside the Park Home Run*, cutting the lead to 3. Attempting to stop the bleeding, the CL sent a new pitcher to the mound, who got Mohammed to line out to 3B for the second out. Pitcher Paul Duffin then came to the plate and singled to right field for the first hit of his career. Jupiter followed with a single past the 2B to put runners on the corners and bring the tying run to the plate in Zeus. However, Zeus didn't even have a chance to swing as Jupiter was thrown out trying to steal 2nd to end the inning.

CL 14 / UL 11

Top of the 8th - The CL pitcher struck out swinging and Abraham followed with a hot grounder to second that Odin fielded for the second out. A mortal followed with a weak groundout to short to end the top of the 8th.

CL 14 / UL 11

Bottom of the 8th - Zeus started the half-inning off with a groundout to first. Lao-tzu then drew the walk, drawing a pitching change from the CL. Mortal William Trask grounded into a fielder's choice, putting him at first with two outs. Mortal Kendry Diez struck out swinging, leaving the UL with only 3 outs to come back.

CL 14 / UL 11

Top of the 9th - Awonawilona began the inning by flying out softly to right field. Tekkeitsertok followed with a potential faith-killing solo blast (his second HR of the game) to CF, extending the lead to 4. Only the most faithful of deities still held hope after mortal Albert Andrews followed with a blast down the left field line that the wind blew fair to extend the lead to 5. Mortal Howard Panek followed with a double and UL got a small sigh of relief as 1B Jupiter dove and robbed Jesus Christ of a sure-fire double. Satan finished his offensive day by grounding out to short, leaving him 1-5 on the day.

CL 16 / UL 11

Bottom of the 9th - While some remained to wave their Rally Holy Books, the majority of fans were nervously silent and others began to leave as the UL began their last 3 chances, down by 5. Anu led off the inning with a single to right. Odin drew a walk, putting men on first and second and bringing the crowd back to life...figuratively speaking. Mohammed brought the crowd to its feet as he crushed one down the right field line that, again, just sailed foul. He fouled a number of pitches off, but took a 3-2 fastball between first and second for an RBI single. Mortal Manny Romero followed with a sac bunt, advancing the runners to 2nd and 3rd. The crowd exploded as Jupiter lined a ball into the right field corner for a 2 RBI double, cutting the lead to just two and bringing the tying run to the plate. The CL All-Stars countered with a pitching change, as much to replace their ineffective pitcher, but also to try and 'ice' Zeus, the Greek Father God who remained in the on-deck circle with a fungo resting on his shoulder while the new pitcher threw his warm-up pitches. The crowd chanted his name as Zeus came to the plate with a man on second and one out. Zeus lined one to left-center field that looked for sure to be extra bases, but Tekkeitsertok ripped out the fans' hearts as he dove and made a tremendous catch and fired a perfect strike to second to nail Jupiter, who was already on third when the ball was caught to end the game.

FINAL SCORE - CL 16 / UL 14

A great game that came down to the wire and featured a breath-taking ending as well as an inside the park home run - UL fans were disappointed by the ending but were more than pleased to bear witness to the excitement. Philadelphia RF and Inuit deity Tekkeitsertok more than earned All-Star MVP honors through his amazing defensive performance as well as going 3-4 with 4 runs scored, 5 RBI and 2 HRs.

Greek God Zeus was visibly upset after the game and had to be consoled by other deities. "I was the tying run twice! TWICE! I don't care how many virgins get tossed into volcanos, nothing could cheer me up right now..." He then dejectedly walked off, dragging his thunderbolt behind him.

[Hoeksam]

*LMAO* Unbelievable read... had me laughing the whole time!

How ironic, though, that Jesus Christ and Satan were on the same team. I wonder how much ribbing was going on during the game amongst the diety's...

[UngratefulDead]

... and, starting in left field, your lord and savior, the son of God, JEEEEESUS CHRIIIIIST!

This would make a funny movie, or at least a South Park episode...



And I'm not actually Christian, so don't give me any flak about that lord and savior comment, it was for effect

[rogmax11]

Funny, I always assumed Jesus would play rightfield if He wasnt the closer. And tsk, tsk: Christ steals a base? His Father would not be pleased.